A Few Days with Touchscreen Controller

Ranked matches in 王者荣耀 hadn’t been going well lately. Someone suggested I buy a “touchscreen” controller to improve the feel of the controls and boost my win rate, so I did.

Taobao has way too many kinds of these things, so I bought every single type.

Right now these products fall into three categories…

1. Three-suction-cup mounting

This is probably the most common kind — three suction cups to hold it in place, with touch controls in the middle.

Honestly it shouldn’t be a problem, but… it still sucks. Why? Because the suction cups slide. If you’re only moving up or left and right, fine, but if you back up, there’s a big chance it just stops working…

Backing up is important, though. Running away! You can’t fail to run away at a critical moment! Apparently other people say it’s fine on small-screen phones, but I’m playing on a Pixel C so it slides…

Okay then.

2. Single-suction-cup mounting

Supposedly an improved version, with just one suction cup — even if it slides, you can slide it back, so it doesn’t matter much.

But while it doesn’t slide in use, a new problem appeared.

This thing is too tall. While you’re holding it and playing, the whole joystick’s single suction cup can lose suction and snap off and fly away.

In short, it’s too flimsy, and sometimes it still fails when pressing down.

3. No suction cup

This is supposedly the final version — it gives up on suction cups and just acts as a spacer, so at least your fingers don’t affect it.

Actually this one should be about the best, but it’s still… unpleasant to use.

How to put it — not sensitive enough. It doesn’t slide and control isn’t much of a problem, but it’s just not sensitive enough. Sometimes dragging does nothing, sometimes you lose control of the direction.

Sad.

Some people say to use a controller. I actually want to say a controller is worse than a touchscreen joystick — casting skills is a problem… And when I used various controllers I got hammered into the ground. I couldn’t stand it anymore, threw the controller away, used my fingers, and ended up turning the game around.

In the end I gave up on all these stupid devices and just played with my fingers, and then went on a win streak to Diamond 4. I’ve had less time and played less lately, so I probably won’t make it to 王者 this season.

Sometimes you have to sigh — mobile game controls are designed for phones in the first place. Going out looking for peripherals is just making trouble for yourself…