FOREO Luna Mini 2

Apparently every woman on earth owns one of these things. It’s called the Luna Mini 2. And naturally, I got told to buy one too.

Supposedly it’s for washing your face. But after staring at it for a while, all I see is a vibrating motor shaped like a massager, wrapped in rubber nubs that look like a shoe brush. You smear soap or cleanser on your face, rub this thing around while it buzzes, then rinse. Done.

So it’s a shrunken-down vibrator for your face. And you’re telling me this thing costs 900+ yuan?

Highway robbery?

That said, it does go on sale. Around Black Friday each year you can order from overseas and get it for roughly 400 yuan, so if you’re patient you can wait for that price. Or you can buy it on eBay, where some scalper has probably stockpiled them.

Buying it at full price is not worth it. Honestly, I don’t think it’s worth it over 200 yuan. I’m not even convinced the vibration does anything, even though every woman who’s used one swears it works:

“After washing with this, my skin feels so smooth~”

Are you sure it’s not just your face going numb from the buzzing, so it feels slippery when you touch it?

And it’s always the women hollering at their husbands to buy it. I asked my married classmates, and every single one of them, same damn story.

One of them even told me: “This is only the beginning.”

“First they make you buy the Mini 2.”

“Then there’s the face-slimming device.”

“And some wrinkle-removal machine.”

“All from Japan or Korea.”

See, I’ve been saying it all along: those Japanese housewives keep churning out IQ-tax products. The Sendai housewives even use an app to improve their sleep! Absolutely scammed.