I haven’t touched Overwatch in ages. Last time I played was placements, and I was about to start grinding ranked when the trash talk broke out among my teammates not even a few minutes in. I’m not young anymore. I play games for fun, not to win or lose. What I hate most is infighting between teammates. It’s supposed to be 6v6. Even if you’re not great, if you cooperate and give it your all, losing is still fun. Why do some people care so much about winning, and why do they love flaming their own team until it turns into a 6v1 for the enemy and a quick loss? Or the reverse — we’re attacking, the other team infights, and we get a free 6v1 win. Harsh to say, but that kind of infighting means “you never even get one proper game.” Somebody always decides they can’t win, gives up, and starts screaming. Every time. Go look at Reddit. It’s nothing but bile. Everyone claims they carried the whole match, everyone says their teammates are trash. I’m curious whether all the god-tier players really do congregate on Reddit. It’s just pointless. I want to play a game and have fun. Why does it have to turn into a shouting match? Whether or not I’m the one getting flamed, seeing that kind of infighting and ugliness still makes me feel sick. Yeah, not upset — sick. Same kind of sick as seeing bad public behavior out in the real world. Flaming people in games isn’t civilized, as far as I’m concerned.

Another year’s over. Honestly, I’ve been meaning to write something for days now… but every time I actually grab the keyboard, my head feels stuffed with cotton… my thoughts grind to a halt… basically I just get hit by a wave of tiredness and can’t put sentences together. So I kept putting it off, and here we are at the end. At the very least, before 2014 rolls in, I should say something about this past year — it mattered a lot to me… so let me just ramble with my messy thoughts.