I don’t know when wearable tech first became a thing, but somehow it snuck up on us and suddenly everyone was paying attention. Plenty of people have huge expectations for these little gadgets strapped to their heads, wrists, and necks—as if wearing one would automatically log every meal, every trip, every wild maneuver, every river crossing, and with a single button press instantly display your HP, MP, strength, intelligence, agility, stamina, spirit, haste, crit rate, specialization, and tenacity. Reality is harsh. You’re dreaming. The first wave of bands that got people’s attention were led by Jawbone. Those things weren’t exactly cheap, the practicality wasn’t exactly a pleasant surprise, and durability wasn’t exactly great either (remember that product with the three-month death curse?). The result was that they became toys for a handful of geeks with money to burn, and most people just watched from a distance (myself included). As a prodigal son, it’s not that I didn’t want to buy, buy, buy—but you need a solid, necessary excuse to chop off your hand. You need an absolute reason like “I’m doing this for my health” to reduce the guilt of wasting money. Back then, the ones with good features were too expensive, and the cheap ones didn’t work well, so I held back. Then in July this year, I saw the pre-order news for the Bong II band. I’d actually been following their first-gen product—never used it, but it looked decent enough, at least by domestic standards. So out of curiosity I checked the pre-order price for the second gen: 99 yuan. What? 99 yuan? The first gen was over 600, right? I looked it up and sure enough, it was 99. I also saw what it looked like, and instantly understood why it was 99. Honestly, it’s ugly.